That's Entertainment
by Lumiere Nordiques
Summary: Blossom simply wants to enjoy the school play, but that's impossible with Brick sitting next to her, acting like an obnoxious moviegoer. Reds one-shot. Rated T for some in-play innuendos.


**_So I wrote this a long time ago and never finished it because, apparently, I have a very hard time finishing projects that I've started. I'm like that guy from Jimmy Neutron! In my alternate universe, the Rowdyruff boys were officially destroyed by Him and were recreated by Richard Valente. I think you'll understand once you read it._**

**_Anyway, I hope you enjoy this, and don't be afraid to leave a review._**

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><p><strong>That's Entertainment<strong>

It was hot, and when I mean hot, I mean _hot_. The stifling heat was so intense, I felt beads of sweat trickle down my face. To make matters worse, the auditorium was tightly packed with warm bodies. They were all here to watch the Drama Department's fall production of a suspense/thriller_. _The mass of bodies seemed to cause the temperature to steadily creep up. It seemed like everybody in Townsville had cranked their AC on. The power failed and now the school was without air conditioning. I blew a gust of cold wind onto my hand and pressed it against my forehead.

Somebody suddenly fell into the seat beside me, knocking my hand away from the armrest in the process. I turned my head. "Excuse me but-" I sputtered to a halt, staring at the redhead sitting beside me. "You have got to be kidding me."

"Only seat available," Brick said, smirking. He slouched into the seat.

I glared at him. "Well, you should have just stood. I was saving that seat for Buttercup."

Brick raised a brow. "Oh, you mean her?" He pointed a thumb over his shoulder.

I turned and caught sight of my green-eyed sister sitting in the very last row, surrounded by football players. I gave her a betrayed look that she obviously missed since she was too busy arguing with Butch. Huffing, I turned back in my seat. Traitor. She left me, and now I was stuck with the most insufferable guy who has ever existed.

I swiped the accumulating sweat off of my neck, hoping beyond hope that Brick would not do anything to annoy me. I don't want to ruin Bubbles's big moment by having an argument with Brick while she's performing. She'd kill me before I could kill Brick. The best solution was simply to ignore him.

Unfortunately, Brick is very hard to ignore.

The play had just begun. Bubbles played the female lead. She portrayed the emotionally unstable woman perfectly and I couldn't help but be very proud. Her "husband" was none other than Boomer. Just when another character, a neighboring farmer, was introduced, I heard _it_. The sound of an incoming text. My head whipped around, and I glared at Brick. He ignored me, pressing buttons into his phone. The bright light coming from the device definitely attracted a few glances.

"Put that away," I hissed. Brick ignored me. He finished typing and shoved the phone in his pocket. "Do you realize how rude you're being. People are trying to watch-" I heard a shushing sound behind me and stopped speaking.

"At least I'm not talking. Shut up," Brick said. The nerve!

I crossed my arms, staring at the stage. Then, the beep came again. Brick pulled his phone out. Oh. My. God. "Brick! I swear to God, if you don't put that away, I'll destroy it."

"You'd owe me a new phone," he replied. I took a deep breath so I wouldn't smack him. Instead, I snatched the phone out of his hand. He opened his mouth to shout, and I shoved my hand against it.

"You'll get it back after the play. I swear, it's like I'm your babysitter." He glowered at me and pushed my hand away.

"Give me the damn phone."

"No."

"Give-"

Mrs. Sanders, the Drama director, suddenly appeared beside Brick. "Please be quiet, you two. Blossom, I expect better of you," my shoulders fell, "and Mr. Valente, if you cause any more disturbances, I will have to ask you to leave." Brick didn't seem to care. He leaned down and searched through his backpack while she spoke. Mrs. Sanders narrowed her eyes at him but didn't say anymore. The teachers had long since given up trying to teach the juvenile delinquent some manners. He was a lost cause.

To be fair, he _had _become much better since Him decided that the three boys were "worthless" and had them killed. Again. They'd been recreated by a biochemist, Richard Valente. He wasn't some kind of psychotic villain or mass murderer, which probably surprised the Rowdyruff boys. The man was a completely normal human who had stumbled upon a special formula for creating life, much to his surprise. Don't get me wrong, the boys still had some antisocial tendencies, but at least they had a stable father figure to rely on once and a while. It did wonders for their mental wellbeing.

I slipped Brick's phone into my right pocket, but not before turning it off. For some strange reason, Brick didn't say anything, although he did shoot be a dirty look.

I turned my attention back to the play. Bubbles and the other characters were discussing the murder of the former owner of Bubbles's house. I sighed, hoping I hadn't missed much. The play progressed, and the heat intensified. It took all I had to concentrate on the play instead of squirming in discomfort.

Then, Brick began whispering in my ear. "He's screwing her." I shuddered (not because of his warm breath against my skin) because of his sentence. The two subjects were Boomer's character and his sister. No joke. A few seconds later, the audience seemed to come to the same conclusion, thanks to a few well-placed innuendoes by the sister, and a collective, "Ew," rose from the crowd. I was surprised that the department wanted to perform such a risqué play.

Brick kept on whispering random sentences, purposefully irritating me.

"Saw that coming."

"The chick is insane."

"Wonder if that gun really works."

"She should have just shot them."

"Shut up," I snapped impulsively, just as the body of the dead sister was discovered hanging in the foyer. My exclamation was drowned out by screams of fear.

"Or what? You'll tell on me?" he sneered.

I felt a muscle in my temple twitch in irritation. I opened my mouth to tell him off, but somebody shushed us. I fell silent, glowering at the actors on stage. A bead of sweat rolled down my neck and I wiped it off.

The tension in the air thickened along with the storyline. Special effects thunder boomed on the stage. I felt something land on my thigh and jumped, swiping it reflexively. It was Brick's hand. "If you do that again, I'll break your-" Another shushing sound silenced me, but I gave Brick the coldest glare I could muster up.

Suddenly, I heard a familiar song begin playing to my left. Turning my head, I shot a questioning look at Brick. He fumbled with something in his pocket, and I came to a realization. My hand flew to my empty pocket. "Give me my phone," I said slowly, dangerously. How did he get it anyway?

Brick managed to stop my ringing phone. Who would be calling me at this time anyway? "Sure, when you give my phone back to me."

"You were texting during the play," I said hotly. "I wasn't. Now give. It. Back."

"Who's Jason?" Brick asked.

The annoying guy behind us said, "Will you two stop flirting. I'm trying to watch the stupid play."

Brick turned in his seat. "If you value your pathetic life, I suggest that you never speak to me again." The boy paled and shrunk into his seat.

"You were going through my phone," I said, furious.

"No. He just called." Brick tossed my phone in the air.

My hand shot out and grabbed a fistful of his shirt just when the lights went out. People screamed. I normally wouldn't resort to using violence to get my way, but the weather was already making me cranky before Brick came into the picture. So instead of acting like the rational person that I was, I knocked Brick out of his seat.

When the lights came back on, I was wrestling with Brick on the floor, attempting to pry the bloody phone from his hand. "Miss Utonium!" Mrs. Sanders gasped. I immediately released Brick from the chokehold he was in. "How inappropriate! I must ask both of you to leave immediately!"

"But Mrs. Sanders. You don't understand-" I began.

"She tried to friggin' kill me," Brick exclaimed, rubbing his head.

"Oh, whatever! He stole my-"

"Be quiet and leave," she snapped. "You are lucky I'm not reporting you two for this." I tried to protest, but she herded me out of the auditorium, shutting the doors in my protesting face.

Rude!

"Look what you did," I exclaimed, rounding on Brick. "We got kicked out of the auditorium because of you, you jerk!"

"It wouldn't have happened if you stopped with your holier-than-thou attitude and just gave me my phone," Brick growled.

I pulled the object in question out of my pocket and dangled it in front of him. "Oh, you want this?" I asked innocently. "Is this what you want?" Brick tried to grab it, but I pulled it away at the last second. Not until I had mine safely in my hands.

Brick tossed my phone in the air and snatched it back before I could. "Is this what _you _want? You're not getting it until I get mine."

I scowled, turned on my heels, and stalked away from him. Brick caught up to me. "So who's Jason?" He stared at me forcefully. I felt my cheeks redden but couldn't tell whether it was because of the heat or Brick's stares.

"Why do you care?" I muttered, fiddling with the buttons on Brick's phone.

"I don't know… Curiosity."

I stopped at the foot of a staircase. What should I do now? My whole class was watching the play. Brick continued to stare at me. I fumbled with his phone. "Jason is an eight-year-old boy that I babysit sometimes," I finally said.

Brick stopped mid-step. "W-why would he be calling you?"

"It's probably his mom," I replied in an obvious tone.

"Oh."

We walked in an awkward silence. Suddenly, Brick veered towards the exit doors. "Where are you going?" I asked, standing in the middle of the hallway.

"Taco Bell. Want to come?" Brick said. He stopped by the double doors and turned to me. My brows furrowed, and Brick rolled his eyes. "Come on, Pinkie. School's practically over anyway." I still hesitated. "I'll buy you a taco."

"And give me my phone back?"

"Only if you return the favor," he said.

"Throw in a drink and we have a deal."

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><p><strong>If anybody is wondering, the play is called <em>I'll Be Back Before Midnight<em>, and it is an amazing mystery/thriller that my school once did. **

**I didn't expect the one-shot to end this way, but it did. I'm quite happy with the ending. **

***Signs "Peace out"***


End file.
